Archive for July 2008
Barack O’Kennedy – dream ticket or Democrat nightmare?
Perhaps those who predicted the Kennedy Clan was over were a little premature. Barack Obama – fresh from firing one female political aide for calling Hillary Clinton a ‘monster’ – is now said to be turning to another.
In what seems to be the silliest political rumour of the week, the Obama camp may be considering making Caroline Kennedy vice president. As a source tells Washington Whispers, “Caroline is the good Kennedy.” That isn’t saying much, unfortunately. Still, it could be worse. At least Caroline probably won’t call her enemies ‘monsters’ or shoot anyone in the face.
Fatz Deli! Meg Ryan as you’ve never seen her before
THIS is actress Meg Ryan as her fans hope never to see her – 140lb heavier and slobbing in the street, feeding on junk food. Don’t worry though – it’s just a scene from her new movie, “My Mom’s Hot Boyfriend.” Meg, 46, is best known for her other famous eating scene in When Harry Met Sally in which she faked a screaming orgasm while munching on a sandwich at Katz Deli. This time though, we won’t have “what she’s having.”
While Meg hasn’t quite hit skid row yet in real life, she has suffered a string of flop films – and this one is apparently also going straight to DVD. As gossip site Defamer cruelly says, “To say that Meg’s career is in a free-fall would be to imply that her career hasn’t already hit rock bottom.
“She becomes the latest in a long string of actresses to strap herself into a fat suit, only to magically “slim down” to win the heart of a handsome man — a trick which stopped being funny the second time that the Friends gang went to that well.”
Merry Christmas, Wall Street: here’s your pay cut
Wall Street bankers will have to tighten their belts this Christmas – or at least pull up those silly suspenders they all wear. A review of the latest statements from the Big Apple’s largest financial companies shows that pay and benefits are going to be slashed.
The money men are all right for now but they will get hit in the pocket when it comes to handing out the end of year bonuses, with a $10 billion slashing anticipated. In total, the city men will have received $18 billion less than they did the previous year.
The New York Times laments, “A decline in bonuses of that magnitude would easily eclipse the drop of 2001, the year of the 9/11 terrorist attacks, when total bonuses declined by $6.5 billion.” It’s all very sad, sniff, sniff. Mind you, they get paid too much anyway so no one else will really be complaining …except their wives.
You can’t fire me, I’m quitting
Working as a publicist for $50 million girl Heather Mills must be a challenging job. But Michele Elyzabeth apparently finds it a little too challenging and has handed in her notice after four long years. The last straw, she says, was when Paul McCartney’s ex-wife called her “stupid.”
“I refuse to be subjected to her outbursts,” bleated Elyzabeth to US tabloid TV show, Extra. “On reflection and given the way I have been treated, I now have sympathy with much of what the British press has reported about her. Yesterday, we engaged in a heated argument during which she called me “stupid.” I reminded her that she was not “God” and she answered, “I will never ever talk to you again.”
While we admire Michele’s principled stand, you can’t help wondering how she would have carried out her job successfully in the future if Heather was never going to talk to her again.
Happy Hooker makes money in Amsterdam …but she’s given up the day job
She was once dubbed “The Happy Hooker,” after writing a bestselling book about her successful life as a high-flying madam in New York. So it may be surprising to learn that when Xaviera Hollander moved back to Amsterdam – home of the infamous Red Light Area – she decided the ‘oldest profession’ was no longer for her.
Guests coming to her bed and breakfast hotel hoping for a bit of Eliot Spitzer-inspired hanky-panky will be sorely disappointed. Although, as Hollander tells The London Times, “I’m 65 and my boobs are hanging.” Things could be worse though for Xaviera, who was deported from New York after her book hit the shelves. “I’ve just married this man 10 years younger than me so I’m having a great time.”
